Archive for July, 2009
Inevitably I am begining to feel older, but it doesn’t seem to effect the urge to be young with you again. It’s as if I am standing beside the lighthouse humbly waiting to call you home. I have given up years ago on leaving notes around the city, and there is little virginity left in my thoughts or soul, but in my poems I sometimes can ignite and remember the virgin thoughts that brought us together.
It is a disease to believe that you can live without love, a disease that has effected many for them to die wanting of love, when they should die for love. My only regret would be that I never died for love would be on my tomb stone, for in some ways I feel I never put up the fight you desired. I am not facing a Doctor, Lawyer, or Prince that far reaches my place in society or the world. I am facing the tradtion of families different than my own, and the mind of a 29 year old woman who can not make it up, however, for some it takes 50 years, others never, accept maybe as their last thought in the form of a regret or confirmation.
I am not waiting on a riverboat or in a hovel office, but often I feel this way. The only sanity I have is the child who has every ounce of love once shared between us, and I get to share this with her every day I spend with her. Captured in her eyes, in her voice, her lovely laugh and zeal for humor and accepting the tribulations… I only wish she could overcome this fear. The fear I have seen in you, the fear you will face someday, the fear she doesn’t even know she has but we all do, and for her… I will also be there. I could not express it to you in any other way, and I don’t know at what point exactly I lost you, but going away for a year, turned into eternity. I have visited the shores of Cartegena, I have seen the river from which love floats, I have never taken my eyes off the ocean or the mountains or my mind from you.
Whether it was telegram, fax, mail, email, or phone, I have sent my words to you… like no other could for no person I know could love the way I do and have for 12 years of being with you. I wish we could find a way to get away from them all, mark the door with an “X” so that they would believe we have the plague and would never come in, some way to make it all go away, for their life is the illusion not ours. Its the illusion that someone else is right, that we were too young, or incapable of resolving our issues, or that we are now to different when we have never been more the same. I have no jail to break out of to run to you and stop you from marrying another, I have the resolve to wait until I am 80 years old if I can live that long, but I am happy in the fact that I know you read this letter, that I have our daughter to love, and that everything I ever loved in you exists pure as it was the day I met you…
Your Canadian Boy. Maybe you can tell your boyfriends I am coming to town someday and that you don’t want to see them anymore, maybe someday I will have the pleasure of being the good one for you again, or maybe someday, this will happen for someone else… who can write at least of that illusion that still afflicts me, or the reality that is now far less real than the illusion we live. The red lines on the flag is the blood I have bled, the yellow is the nature of those between us and greatness, and ourselves for not facing it.
Posted in 
You have been touched by many people in a day,
Elbows fabric shoulders skin,
To you they don’t mean anything,
But you would remember my sweet embrace,
And how I ran my fingers down your face,
Although upon the surface my love would start,
It would reach the greatest depths of your heart!
How to…
Poetry, music, sweet sayings, a listening ear
Nice stories of when you were young
But not about past loves to keep you clear
Give gifts that can be hung
In the window to color their life
Go on small trips and walks
Converse about dreams, not strife
Keep Negativity out of your talks
If it veers towards the subject
Confuse with creative quote
Then give them something
They cant object
Just keep to this antidote
A positive way to care
Is by showing the fruits I bare
Don’t ever, ever ask why
Because why do we love
Just stare deep into their eyes
All that should be enough.
I’ve got the time to wait around
To wait around for you,
For my little heart is bound
Bound when you’re in view.
Hear all my thoughts trapped inside
As my love does sit and brew.
Waste not the time searching world wide
When the love at home is true.
Always with you
Look at the bed unmade
And Reminesce of me
Think of where we loved and laid
What we came to be
Look careful at the tattered quilt
Twisted over the rippled sheets
Where our love was built
And our hearts would often meet
Smell the flowers of love in the air
The sweet scent of my body and hair
Although the room did seem to be bare
Now you know that I am here
Beware My Love
A disease that has effected
The whole of the body
The ears that ache till they hear
The voice of
The eyes that pain and water
For the loss of
The sore skin that waits
For the touch from
The joints that ache to go
Towards some
And what of the Monday Lost in bliss or nostalgia
No one is immune to this infliction
Contagious from human affection
To be aware of it is to have seen
To know what all this means
To David Richer, just because he is a love sick puppy. Gibby
The eyes that roam the room astray
For the chance to catch another gaze
Or a gentle brush, the subtle graze
That gets ones head to raise.
What it takes or what I try
Doesn’t have to reward reply
For the love I give and apply
Comes back to me as time whisks bye
(Addition)
What it takes or what I try
Doesn’t have to reward reply
For the love I give and apply
Comes back to me as time whisks bye
When Im around you I feel,
I feel I’ve been dipped into a vat
Of love
Surrounded, saturated, drowning
In Love
Not just the emotions, but like a blanket has wrapped itself around me and I was inside it,
In love
You surrounded me when you’re near
Your eyes consume me
And when I get closer to you
I get a soft sensation that
Tickles my skin like a million
Feathers were slowly floating down
My naked body.
There is always one of those friends
You know the one, the beautiful people
The eyes that capture a rooms attention
The person everyone knows if you mention
Yes, the eyes are innocent and dreaming
The lips are luscious and gleaming
The skin as soft as a baby’s bottom
More memorable than a Paris street in Autumn
Yes, you know these people maybe your one of them
Like a picture out of a fashion magazine
J’aime le monde
Parceque tu se leves en le monde
J’aime afrique
Parceque tu se leves en afrique
J’aime toi
Parceque tu se leves en moi
Mais madame sil tu plait
Ne nettoy pas te pieds en moi
